artwork by Tara @SentFrmHeaven_

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday to you

We’ve postponed the riot

And your shiv is brand new!

Send us $33 and we absolutely promis you’ll never get shiv’d.

Buy a piece of our hottest merch, everyone is doing it!

Browse our recent blog posts:

Porn is Absolutely Disgusting

Porn is absolutely disgusting and unwanted most of us most of the time. I will provide proof. FACT: In America, there are 1440 minutes in a single day. FACT: An 8 hour night of sleep contains 480 minutes Imagine it is 2 hours until your work alarm goes off. You are...

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Trump and Hillary do the AEE

Trump and Hillary at the AEE! find the two dirtiest politicians at the expo all day! Today only you can meet Trump and Hillary as they get down and dirty American porn style at the AVN. Trump is sure to be presidential and Hillary is sure to be drunk! The majority of...

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